My View

Some people think i crazy, some people think im smart, I have been called many things and it did not bother me as long as they were saying something to me.Any attention is better than no attention and if bad attention worked then I was bad.

If I had to describe how i feel inside when i am getting frustrated is it like jumping out of a plane without a parachute, i dont care what happens when it hits the ground that is the last of my worries, all i think about is how much I want this ride to be over. That is the story of my life. I Know what happens in the end everybody does, so its the choices i make after i jump, what if i had a gun when i jumped would i use it before i hit. The whole reason i jumped out of the plane without a chute was i was afraid it would crash and i could not handle it.

I am the type of person who will try and make the best of the fall, i will enjoy everysecond, I am not worried about the splatter that is the finish line the end to pain and suffering and all things on this planet suffer and all things on this planet will cease to exist. That is why it is important to know who you are so no one can knock you down. Be true to yourself.

When a person sees the world in the palm of their hand they can see the beginning of life, from our creation of a single cell and how we evolved into what we are today, one interesting fact is all life started in the ocean or sease pool of life and only a few species remain we survived because our genes our dna our genetic markers needed to survive, our first cells were happy just multiplying then doubled, then we needed to grow so our cells doubled now we can eat and multiply and then we needed to protect ourselves so we became small and fast and breed alot we were probably like mice or cockroaches or rabbits millions0f these mini humans running around eating everything and breeding, but we were warm blooded and our prime instinct was to survive eat and breed, not much as changed. The end is when the sun explodes in 200 million years our solar system has gone supernova two times before that is why gold is so special it takes a tremendous amount of energy like a sun exploding to make gold. It is not made from earthly forces like diamonds.

One thing I love about myself is I like puzzles, I get drawn to puzzles like cops to coffee or mosquitos to light. They feed my dopamine, which fuels my imagination.

I can not make a decision if my life depends on it and i can not judge not sure why.  

But I have never met a problem I could not over come it can takes hours days weeks or years but i always find solutions. I have had so many problems just living everyday, any problem now would just cause me an overload and send me on a downward spiral, so i have just stopped worrying about things i can not change and that is the past. The past is the past, leave it there a person cant change it why do people always focus on the problems and not focus on solutions.

I live more like a dog than a human, a dog does not worry about a toy or food until they want to play or eat, then food or toy becomes the dogs world. I have never disciplined my puppies or make them beg for treats, some people may call the spoiled i think of them as creative. I do not worry about coffee until i am out and i dont worry about my hydro until the power is out. This has caused me problems my whole life, I always needed someone to take car of the small things.